She told herself it was time to leave

Leave notes in her memoir

Let the world read her memories

So the ink on the pages

Search through the eyes of her reflection

As she holds the choice to life to her head

She,

She’s tired

Tired of the bullshit story she tells herself

Uses to encourage the magnitude of her existence

Tired of the waterfalls in the night

Tired of the leaky eyes in the morning

Bagged up,

Cracked out,

Drugged veined body that she carries around

She’s so tired

Tired to the point where the doctors are spiraling their fingers around her depression

So tired

Where she can’t get a grip of what constitutes of the day

Tired

So tired that her feet aches but because she’s walked a mile for way too long she don’t feel the pain like before

They don’t burn in the wrong places any more.

They are too familiarized with the routine check of starvation

Not having the right soul food to nourish her mind

Quenching her thirst to sad reminders of her crowded loneliness

She’s tired

Tired of the sorry excuse that she made of her life

She’s strangling herself with the To Do List of tomorrow

But she ain’t certain if it will come

Let the bullet sit in the gaps of your brain

Make homes in your blood

Take rest in your silence

Allow it make ruffles in your ears

Take a breath

It’ll sink

Sink holes in your veins

Venture your system

To lurk in your thoughts

Pass through your worries

Pass through your stress

End the life in which you cannot make

By your hands alone

You,

You pull the trigger

You pull the trigger

Pulling it in and out

Up and down

Circling your options

Weighing every possible outcome to the gun

A machine

So small

Yet holds powers beyond measure

Hold stories told with one voice

In unison, they all scream

She’s left there

Scattered into small atomic particles

She’s left there

She’s left tattooing her bedroom floor with red runs of clot

Making droplet splurges form creative incentives

She lets the blood seep out of her head

Onto the floor

Onto the flower printed smiles on her dress

Pull the trigger

She’s tired